Rant #107: Chubbsy Ubbsy, You Might Say

Did anybody see the picture of the 19-lbs. baby that made the rounds a few weeks ago? I have posted one of the photos of this kid here that was in one of the local papers. Here, the baby is pictured next to a normal-sized child, and you can see just how huge this kid is.

I can’t imagine any baby being born at such a weight. I think my son and daughter were pretty normal in the weight area when they were born. I think my son was 7 lbs.-plus and my daughter was 8 lbs.-plus.

Both were good sizes for babies, but I just can’t imagine a woman giving birth to a 19-lbs. watermelon, with the pits.

The large baby’s mom had diabetes, which could have effected the child’s weight. Or it could have been some type of glandular problem, none of these or both of them.

All I know is that this kid is enormous. And I feel for the mother, who must have been in great pain or at least discomfort while carrying this butterball for nine months.

Incredibly, there have been bigger babies born in the low 20-lbs variety.

How can the human body withstand such a large-sized baby? Will the mother feel aftereffects, even if she delivered with via a Caesarian Section?

And what will the child’s life be as he gets older? Will he continue to be the biggest one (in width) in his class, or will the child be normal in every way as it gets older?

The child was born in Indonesia. I don’t know what they think about heavy kids—and adults—there, but with our American societal obsession with slimness, would a kid like this be the object of taunts and finger pointing as the boy got older if he still retained such a mammoth weight?

We all knew the "fat boy" when we were kids, or at least saw the fat kid on TV. Remember Norman “Chubby” Chaney, the fat boy in the Little Rascals? Chaney actually died from his obesity as a teenager.

The “rounder” one always gets the laughs. Lou Costello, who was actually quite an athlete, chubbed up for his part in the comedy team of Abbott and Costello to help play off Bud Abbott’s thin physique.

And who could forget Oliver Hardy, who looked absolutely huge next to the paper-thin Stan Laurel?

I just hope that this kid can lead a normal life, and that his heaviness either dissipates over time or is not the object of any ridicule.

People can be pretty harsh about such things, but the fact of the matter is that so few people are really naturally thin that it boggles the mind why heavy-set people are made fun of like they are.

Rant #106: Cell Phones Ringing Off the Hook

Do you hate cell phones as much as I do? Do they ring at the most inappropriate times, and are their users “in their own world” when using them, even when it is in a situation where serious injury can occur as a result of using this gadget?

Well, the latest episode wasn’t life or death, but it shows how ridiculous that people have become in regulating their cell phone usage.

A few weeks ago, during a preview performance of the Broadway play “A Steady Rain,” which starts high-profile actors Daniel Craig and Hugh Jackman, an audience member’s cell phone rang, and then rang again.

Jackman stopped the play, went out of character and asked the audience, “Can somebody get that?” He then paced the stage until the ringing stopped—and he then went back into character as if nothing had happened.

Theatergoers are routinely reminded before a show begins to shut off their cell phones, or to put them on vibrate. However, there are some people who just won’t follow this request—and damn the actors and their fellow audience members when their phones ring.

I have been to movies, to school meetings and to other events where people simply have to interrupt the proceedings so that they can answer the phone. I have been in the supermarket where I have actually had to raise my voice in order to get by a shopper who is on their cell phone and has no idea that I want to pass them as they clog the aisle with their wagon.

At a Yom Kippur service that I attended a few weeks back, the rabbi asked those attending to shut off their phones—and to not put them on vibrate. The rabbi said that she has learned through trial and error that phones on vibrate continue to make discernible noise, and she didn’t want the holiest day on the Jewish calendar interrupted by these sounds.

And while driving, I can tell you numerous times when I had too-close encounters with other drivers who were talking on the phone and/or texting. And the funny thing is that when I give them the horn, they yell at me like I am at fault.

The dumbest thing I have seen with the phone is when people use their phones while on the subway or the railroad. I mean, this is not your personal phone booth, and I really have no interest in your conversation. But when you are in such close proximity to others using phones, you become part of the interchange between the one with the phone and the one on the other end, whether you like it or not. It’s eavesdropping even when you don’t intend to eavesdrop.

Sure, I have a phone, but it doesn’t have the gizmos and gadgets attached to it like most phones do. It is for calling, nothing else, and I only use it when necessary. In fact, I don’t even know the last time I used my phone. Heck, I don’t even know the phone number by heart.

Phones got out of hand when manufacturers added all the gizmos and gadgets to them. If they were just phones, I don't think we would have the rate of misuse that we have now with these phones.

While I don’t back any government regulation when it comes to these phones, I think that personal common sense is necessary when using them. If you were in a conversation with someone, wouldn’t you consider it bad manners to be interrupted by a phone call?

And why do you want to talk on the phone when you have spent God knows how much for a Broadway theater ticket?

Maybe these people have money to burn. I know that I don’t. And I also don’t have much patience for people who think that the phone is somehow part of their body.

And those phones that fit on your ear—I guess everyone wants to be Uhura from "Star Trek"—everyone but me. I long for the days when phones were at home and in phone booths and that was about it.

In New York, Sen. Charles Schumer has sponsored legislation that would require states to pass laws banning texting while driving. If states do not comply, they lose 25 percent of their federal highway funding. Texting is already banned in many places in this country, but people still do it anyway. Others have proposed that automakers come up with cars that do not allow phones to be used at all while the car is moving.

Our worldwide fascination with these phones have become obsessions, and that is not a good call on whatever end of the line you are on. And a solution is needed, and let's put that on quick-dial.

Rant #105: It's Baseball Season!

I love baseball. I find it to be exciting, exhilarating, and frustrating, all at the same time. I was a lousy player—although I did play in my community’s Little League until I was 15—but I am a great fan.

And the Twins-Tigers’ 163rd game proves that baseball remains our National Pastime.

Even after a grueling six-month, 162-game schedule, two teams were tied with the exact same record in their division, the Central Division of the American League. Thus, an extra game had to be played.

The stakes: the winner goes into the playoffs against the Yankees; the loser goes home.

What the Twins and Tigers gave us was probably the best overall game of the regular season, a 12-inning, four-and-a-half hour affair that had more thrills and spills than a rollercoaster ride. The Twins won 6-5, on a hit by Alexi Casilla (pictured), but the real winners were the fans--both in attendance and those who watched at home--who couldn't have asked for a more breathtaking game to end the regular season and send Major League Baseball into the playoffs leading up to the World Series.

As an added bonus, the game was a late-afternoon game, which is great. Kids could watch the game on TBS without fear that they will fall asleep and not be ready for school the next day.

Personally, I came home from work and saw playoff-level baseball without having to look at the clock.

I guess my interest in the game was heightened by the fact that the Twins will now face the Yankees in the American League Divisional Series, but the Tigers and Twins are two gritty teams that are fun to watch, and they did not disappoint anyone during this game.

What made it even more fun is that the game was played at the Metrodome, that Minnesota mistake that seemingly always plays into the hands of the home team. The Twins will be playing in a new baseball-only outdoor stadium next year, but for now, the frenzy of this place sends shivers down your spine, even while watching in the comfort of your living room.

Sure, the NFL will be going into its fifth week, the NHL has just started its season with the NBA will be coming in right behind it, and the collge football season is in full swing, but it doesn't really matter. Until the final out of the World Series is recorded, this is still baseball season.

Three playoff games on tap today ... I mean, it doesn't get better than this!

Rant #104: Social Networking or Social Harassment?

I have my personal trepidations about social networking sites. Although I am on a couple of them, I have my doubts about their veracity and their context in our society.

I currently belong to Facebook and Twitter, and I once frequented Delphi. I guess that they are all good for what they do—helping you to stay in touch with people you ordinarily wouldn’t hear from. I just joined Classmates.com, so I am personally networked up to the gills.

These sites are fine if you are trying to locate long-lost friends or keep up with your relationships in this fast-changing world.

However, I think a lot of people use these sites as a replacement for one-on-one social relationships, and I think that is where these sites are totally inept.

It is one thing to join these sites and post innocuous messages about yourself and the world around you.

It is another thing to post messages of hate, upload questionable photos, and/or use these sites to vent venom against humanity.

Several sick people have used these sites to put up vitriol against others, and some have even acted out their aggressions in unfavorable ways, such as the so-called Craiglist killer.

Others just post venom for venom’s sale. On Facebook, my son’s friend was taken to task for being black, and the poster used the “N” word and other derogatory epithets to blast this kid.

Thus, the main problem with these sites is that they are totally unregulated. Anybody who is a member can post whatever they want, and even if the messages are scanned, it can take days before they come down, if they come down at all.

And a lot of people misuse the sites by posting photos of themselves in various stages of dress and undress, opening themselves up to who knows what. And a lot of the people doing these dumb things are teenagers.

Look, the cat is out of the bag. No parent is going to be able to fully regulate what their child does online, but the kids should know better.

And the people who abuse these sites should also know better.

But the sites should know better, too, and provide for a safer environment for those using their services. Sure, there have been security tweaks on most of these sites, but only after something happens.

Now, being part of these sites, I am, I guess, part of the problem. These sites would go away if nobody joined, but people continue to sign up each and every day.

With their growing numbers, I just hope the people running these sites understand that their responsibility moves up a notch every time someone new joins.

But from what I’ve seen, I don’t think they want that extra responsibility.

Rant #103: Not a Red-Letter Day For Letterman

It consistently amazes me how seemingly smart, talented people so often get entwined in things that come back to haunt them.

The most recent case in point is CBS late-night talk show host David Letterman, who outed a producer from the show “48 Hours” as the person who had launched a plot to blackmail him with information related to affairs Letterman had supposedly had with female staffers.

The talk show host made this known to a stunned audience on his show during the night of October 1.

First of all, I have to commend Letterman for coming clean to his viewers. Word would have gotten out anyway through the tabloids, and he would have looked even stupider than he does now if that happened.

And that leads me to my next point. Whether working in an office or working on the staff of a major TV show, one of the first rules is that you don’t date anyone in the office, and you certainly don’t have a sexual relationship with them. This is just common sense.

Why did Letterman stoop so low? He has had a committed relationship to the person he eventually married for a number of years now, and has a son through that relationship. Why was he hunting around for more female flesh to conquer?

And the person who was trying to blackmail him—what were his motives? We have since learned that he had a huge child support bill to pay each month, but anybody making more than $300,000 a year like he was should have been able to afford the $72,000 or so he was paying for his two kids.

Heck, making much less, I was able to afford my payments just fine.

I think there are a lot of holes in this story that need to be filled that probably won’t be, at least for us, the general public. How many women were involved? When did this take place? For how long? Did the women cooperate with the accused? Etc., etc., etc.

A couple of women have come out, but since they were all subordinates to Letterman, I would think CBS would run some type of internal investigation of these incidents. If it is proven that Letterman used his power as "the man" to seduce these women--threaten them with a loss of their job if they didn't succumb--I would think that CBS might have to take some punitive action against the talk show host.

Although I feel some compassion for Letterman, he may be a funny guy, but he has proven himself to be not a very bright one.

Oh, I know, there are people so dedicated to Letterman that they will back him no matter what he does, but once again, if it was your daughter who he painted into a corner, wouldn't your views of him change? That is the yardstick that I use, and yes, he is not the sharpest tool in the shed based on this latest episode.

I wonder when the first tell-all book about Letterman and his show will come out--and you know it will, especially since the door has now been opened with this latest escapade.

Rant #102: When I'm 64 (12 More Years)

Here is my fourth grade class picture. I hooked up with someone on Facebook who I hadn't had contact with in 40 years or so, and he was nice enough to have posted it there. I am in the upper row on the far left in this photo. Boy, was I good looking back then!

Anyway, that photo was taken over 40 years ago. Even though I belong to a number of social networking sites, most of the people in the photo have faded from my memory and I don’t know what happened to them.

Yes, it was a different world back then. Our “iPod” was a pocket transistor radio, and few of us had color televisions. Pay-TV was supposedly just starting at this point, but it wasn’t in my neighborhood in Queens, New York.

I was 10 years old when this picture was taken, and I was a pretty good student. I worked hard, and usually did fairly well in school.

Honestly, the world was beginning to change around myself and my classmates, but you really didn’t know it at that time. Even though President Kennedy was assassinated just four years earlier—and thus, we had already lost some of our innocence—you really wouldn’t know it by this picture. If the date wasn’t on the photo, it could easily have been taken in the 1950s, and not the 1960s (although some of the girls’ clothing would give the mid-1960s away).

However, just a few months after this photo was taken, all hell broke loose in our country. Race riots, the assassinations of Martin Luther King and Robert Kennedy, and a myriad of smaller, yet almost equally daunting episodes happened that helped to wash away the varnish of the 1950s and early 1960s that still encapsulated our world back then.

I look at this photo, and I see how much I have changed physically. I lost my hair, I have a couple more creases on my body that weren’t there way back when, I am a bit taller, and yes, a bit heavier.

I had a gall bladder when this picture was taken; now, I don't have one. The only problem I had with my eyes was that I was nearsighted.

I have been through a divorce, and my second marriage, I am happy to say, has been wonderful. I have two kids, one in college, and one who might go there sometime in the future.

When I was 10 years old, I could not imagine that my life would be as it is today. Could anybody in this group have imagined what they would be doing 40 years later?

The one thing that is basically the same for me is that I feel that I really am the same person that I was when I was a young kid, although I am an adult. I still laugh at the same things, have the same beliefs and the same values.

Physically, people say I look about the same as I did way back when (less the hair), and I kind of agree with them.

However, if anyone would have asked me at the age of 10 what I would be doing when I was 52, I honestly don’t think I would have gotten it right. I don’t know what I would have said, but as a starry-eyed kid, I bet I would never have projected what I am today.

Never in a million years.

Rant #101: Roman's Holiday May Be Over

When does the statute of limitations run out on a rape case, and does the victim actually have a say in the matter?

This issue has come to light as internationally known director Roman Polanski was arrested in Switzerland on a U.S. arrest warrant related to a 1977 child sex charge.

In 1977, Polanski sexually attacked a 13-year old girl he was supposedly shooting photos of for French Vogue magazine. Once charges were filed, he fled the United States and set up residence in France, and was told that if he ever came back to the States, he would be arrested.

His victim has since settled financially with him, and in the past, she has come to terms with the episode, and has even backed Polanski on a number of occasions. She even backed him when he was up for an Oscar for the film “The Pianist,” which he directed. She said in an op-ed piece that I believe ran in the Los Angeles Times that voters (I am paraphrasing) should judge the film and not the man.

The victim, who had acting aspirations as a teenager, now lives in Hawaii and is married with a few kids. She has said that the latest episode to bring Polanski to trial is a waste of time and any measures to bring him to the U.S. should be dropped.

However, the U.S. continues to be interested in this case, and Swiss police detained him on a U.S. warrant as he was going to the Zurich Film Festival to pick up an award.

Does the victim have any say on this case? The incident happened more than 30 years ago, and Polanski has been a fugitive of justice since then. The victim settled with the director, and each has lived out their lives on separate sides of the world.

Why is the U.S. continuing to be interested in bringing Polanski to justice? Nobody will argue that what he did—essentially raping a minor after plying her with drugs—was a horrid thing. But the U.S. has not been able to touch him in more than three decades, why is it pursuing the case now?

I think it is because Polanski is one of the few well-known people in this world who has been able to basically thumb his nose at the U.S. for these many years, and has made a nice living off of these shores. The U.S. could only glare at him for the past three decades, but now, to bring some type of closure to the case, they are pursuing it.

In 1977, Polanski was supposedly going to take a plea bargain from the originally appointed judge, where he would have little or no jail time, and that was going to be the way he repaid society for what he did. However, word leaked out that another judge was going to try the case, and that judge was reportedly not going to be so forgiving, so he fled.

This is an incredibly intricate case because of Polanski’s background, which is full of excess but what preceded by much strife. He is a concentration camp survivor, and his wife, actress Sharon Tate, and his unborn child were murdered by Susan Atkins, a member of Charles Manson’s cult (see Rant #98, September 28, 2009).

In fact, Sharon Tate’s sister has said that Polanski should be let free because the act between himself and the girl was consensual! Somehow, I did not know that such an act between a grown man and a child could ever be a consensual one.

Whatever his background, I think that he should be sent back to the U.S., and when they bring him back, he should be punished, and be punished for running away like he did.

But honestly, what would be accomplished at this juncture by throwing the book at him?

The victim doesn’t want it to happen, but I think her feelings—as an adult—do not really matter. What he did to her those many years ago must be accounted for.

Give him something to do that will help make society better, such as, as part of his “sentence,” have him make a batch of public service announcements related to subjects like date rape, sexually transmitted diseases, and the like.

Also, have him work 1,000 hours of community service at a women’s center that deals with brutality against women.

Actually let him see that what he did 30-plus years ago was a horrid act, by dealing with women who have been through it all.

On the other hand, why should he be treated differently than someone who committed the same act 30-plus years ago but wasn’t a celebrity? You can certainly put up a good argument on both sides of the coin here. Maybe jail time is the way to go here. Give him a number like everyone else who has committed the same crime.

As an aside, more than 100 move business folk have come to his side, stating that he should not be arrested. Woody Allen is one of the signers of this petition.

Sometimes, you have to wonder who your friends really are. I think in this case, as far as Allen signing this petition, this is the perfect example of the pot calling the kettle black, don’t you think?