Wednesday, May 21, 2014

Rant #1,212: Belated Congratualtions



With all the nonsense that has happened over the past number of days, a significant occasion in my personal life came and went, and really, being in the state I was in, I really could not enjoy it.

My daughter turned 26 on May 15, and yes, I know it is nearly a week later, but I want to wish her "Happy Birthday."

I saw her briefly last Thursday, gave her my family's gift and her grandparents' gift, and then went back to doing what I was doing.

I could not really enjoy the occasion this year, because there was lots on my mind.

But man, I remember the exact moment my life changed forever and I became a father.

I was there when she was born, and I was also there when they rushed my daughter to the hospital's intensive care unit.

It was done as a precaution. I won't go into the details, but I went from being a proud father to someone who did not know what was going on.

Again, without going into details, the doctor who delivered my daughter did something that he should not have done, and it nearly had harmful effects on my daughter.

He retired right after this birth, and I hope his retirement was better than his final delivery.

Anyway, when she was in the ICU, she was put between two boys who were no bigger than your fist.

I looked at her, I looked at them, and I knew my daughter would survive, because she was about five times the size of these two boys put together.

Although I never knew their names, I wonder if those kids survived as preemies.

Anyway, because my then-wife was so sick from the delivery and the incompetence of the doctor, I was the one who held my daughter first, who fed her, and who cleaned her.

My then-wife remained in the hospital while we brought my daughter home.

What happened happened between my then-wife and myself, but I always tried to be close with my daughter.

I was often thwarted from doing this, because back then, parental rights were still being worked out, and these situations were handled differently then they are today.

I had joint custody, but it really didn't mean very much at all.

Nonetheless, I was there for her birthdays, there for her graduations ... I was there when she needed me, even though it always wasn't too easy due to various circumstances beyond my control.

I managed to see my daughter grow up from this little baby to a woman, and the road often has been bumpy between us, but it is OK now ... not great, but OK.

I cannot undo the damage that was done to her, or to me at this point in the game.

But I can be proud that she is an upstanding citizen, has a decent job, and I get to speak to her every once in a while.

I guess that is all I can hope for.

So to my daughter, happy birthday again, and I wish you nothing but happiness for the rest of your life.

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