Tuesday, December 3, 2013

Rant #1,095: What the Crap?



Literally.

I had one of those glorious days at work yesterday, one of those days that you don't forget so quickly.

All I ask for is some understanding ... pee and sympathy if you will.

Let me explain.

I drive into work, I get there, and I am the one who opens the building that I work in, so I go about my business just like I have on Mondays for the past nearly two decades at my place of business.

I do what I have to do to get ready for the workday, and then, I feel like I have to go to the bathroom.

So I walk into the bathroom, and to me, the toilet water looks discolored.

I then flush the toilet--and all hell breaks loose.

A funnel of water oozes up the toilet and all over the floor.

Discolored water--and probably other things--cascades all over the floor as I am standing there.

I grab the plunger, and stick it in the toilet, trying to get everything to go down so there won't be any more water explosions.

I am successful in my quest, but there is about an inch of water on the floor around the toilet.

So yes, in my shirt and tie and nice pants and shoes, I grab paper towels and try to sop up the stuff.

I takes about 15 minutes, and the floor is reasonably dry.

But I still have to go to the bathroom.

So I go downstairs, where we have another bathroom, and I literally do my duty there.

I flush the toilet, and there is a problem here too.

The toilet will not flush correctly.

Yes, the particulars went down the toilet, but it didn't flush correctly.

I try several times, and nothing.

I get a blank piece of paper and tape, and write out a sign saying: "Do not use. Does not flush correctly."

I am exasperated, but at least I did my duty, if you will. I will tell my supervisor when he comes in, and it will all be taken care of.

I then have to go back downstairs to fax something out, and I meet up with one of my co-workers, who had just come in after me.

I tell him my plight, and then he discovers something.

"Larry, there is water all over the floor by my desk!" he yells, and lo and behold, the water that I sopped up from upstairs has made its way downstairs, went through the wall, and flopped right down on the floor below.

Well, guess what I did?

In my shirt and tie and nice pants and shoes, I got down on my hands and knees once again and sopped the stuff up.

And the real work day had not even started yet ...

I must have washed my hands 50 times yesterday, and I hope I didn't smell like crap during the day.

I will tell you that no one thanked me for doing what I did, but again, I did my duty.

The P.S. to the story is that we have a guy who comes in to do random jobs, and he looked at both toilets and surmised that a certain part was negligent in both, and that is what caused the problem.

So, all's well that ends well.

But if you told me you had a crappy day at work yesterday, I would tell you that that might be true, but I had even a crappier day.

Literally.

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